Rah-Rah-Rah WHO GIVES A FUCK?

NO ONE.

CARES ABOUT CROATAN CHEERLEADING.



phew. had to get that one off my chest.
i just keep chanting this to myself:
no one cares, you're better off, last year was hell...etc.

but i can't help but feeling that i've made a horrible mistake.

sure, all of my friends swore off the crazyass coach, bitchyass girls, and suckass practices;
I thought this transition would be oh-so-easy.

Not Really.

The grass is always greener on the other side, and ain't that a beotch.
I would have made Varsity.
I would have been happier.
Maybe.

Only time will tell if i made the right decision about for going tryouts this year.
I love cheering, I'm good at it, I actually like watching sports, I love throwing people in the air, and stretching, and jumping, and trying to tumble.

Where else am I valued for my 8 years of dance, and my flexiblility?
That's right--nowhere.

Part of me wants this year to be hell for all of those girls this year. I want them to experience the perpetual frustration that i felt every day at practice. I want to believe that my miserable year will continue over into their season.
Does that make me a horrible person?

I'm avoiding that question.

I'll blame it on human nature for the time being.
(Somehow, that cop out actually works for almost anything)

AHHH.
Why do I feel guilty for quitting, and being jealous of people less talented than I am?

Goal for today:

1. Breathe. Imagine how great your life will be without pompoms.